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This just in: Jessica Alba is a SLUT!

Jessica Alba believes there’s nothing wrong with no-strings-attached sex. And she’s happy to reveal she’s had one-night stands. ‘I just wanted to see what it was like to be with different people,’ she tells US Cosmo. ‘I don’t think a girl’s a slut if she enjoys sex.’ The 26-year-old can’t be faffed with sitting through coffee and croissants - and an uncomfortable silence - the next day. ‘I’m the kind of girl who looks over in the morning and is like, “Do you really have to be here?” she admits.

I really don't think it's possible for me to hate this bitch more then I already do. Ick.

Jessica is ready when you are boys!

Nicky is as dumb as Paris

Apparently Nicky Hilton has some sort of issue with O.C. star Mischa Barton. She apparently called her a “fat pig” at a recent birthday party. God, have you seen Mischa? She is like one-step away from needing to be force fed. That girl is a twig! She’s NOT fat at all.

And Nicky has the nerve to call her fat? This is why bigger girls in society nowadays so insecure. Because people as thin as Mischa Barton are being called overweight. What about those girls that are actually chubby? What are they to think? If Mischa’s fat they are whales? Thanks a lot Nicky for adding to the rise of eating disorder epidemics everywhere. Idiot.

Mischa Barton: So fat it's disgusting right?!

Evangeline Lilly is lost to her ego

Celebrities never fail to disgust as much if not more then us “normal” people. But what’s worse then a celebrity whining about what they don’t have? How about a celebrity whining about something they do have (and pretend they don’t want)!

Lost’s Evangeline Lilly claims as a teen she wished to be ugly because she was so gorgeous that guys were constantly pawing at her. Ego much? "I cried myself to sleep wishing I was ugly because men leered and disrespected me." And I bet you really truly wished you were an ugly cow that guys mocked instead. Yeah, right.

"I pick my nose and I'm not ashamed to admit it. If there's a bogey then just pick it, man."

-Justin Timberlake, he is such a sexy stud

“I've lost a lot of jobs because I was too pretty.
And everybody's like, 'Oh, poor you.' But seriously, you don't get the good roles when you're beautiful.'"

Maybe you should try out to play someone with a huge head. Something tells me you'de get that role no prob Eva.

Avril sells out!

If it isn't bad enough that she used to insult Britney for doing pop music and dancing and now she is dancing in her latest video "Girlfriend" (which is a pure pop track by the way). But now she won't even back up her new slutty image. She says of this BLENDER magazine cover. "Actually, I'm not topless on the cover. I was wearing a tube top, and they just kind of put a banner on top of it."

Uh huh Avril. We believe you.....

"There is no one who is a virgin before they get married...show me someone who's a virgin!"

Just because you are easy doesn't mean everyone else is Gisele!

Britney Spears mocked for gaining weight

I was reading the latest issues of STAR and IN TOUCH magazine and was completely disgusted at the slanderous things they are writing about pop star Britney Spears.

STAR included an article about Britney’s “tubby toes” (toebesity” as they immaturely called it) her fat arms and her double chin.

Now I understand Hollywood has these sick ideas of beauty (like that people like Jessica Alba are curvy when she probably weighs 120 pounds soaking wet) but this is just ridiculous.

Britney may have put on a few pounds but I personally think it’s nothing to get all worked up over. She actually looks healthier with a bit of weight on her. She just had a kid (her second at that) and is going through a nasty divorce with Kevin. OF COURSE she is going to put on weight! Stress will do that to a girl. The press is so unforgiving.

The sad part is chubbier girls will read this and think “if Britney Spears is 140 pounds and considered fat and I weigh 160 pounds I must be a heifer! Maybe I should barf up the mashed potatoes I just ate for dinner!”

And to add insult to injury IN TOUCH’s poll below shows exactly how brainwashed and shallow this world has become. The majority of people voted that stick thin Brit looks better then voluptuous Brit. Sigh. What is this world coming to?

“I don’t like when people try to re-create my look. I don’t like people touching me.”

-JoJo sounds like a little snot to me!

JoJo suffers from serious teenage angst issues

"At the end of the day carbs are the enemy."

If that's the case what does that make world hunger Rihanna?

Coldplays Chris Martin is immature

Remember when you were seven and you wanted to get back at that obnoxious kid that taunted you at recess? So you and your other seven year old friends decided the best plan of action was to either a) throw things at the kid or b) call the kid mean names?

Well, apparently Coldplays Chris Martin thinks calling people names is the mature thing to do, even though he is technically supposed to be an adult.

“When someone insults you to your face about your music, the first thing you want to do is pick on something about their appearance. It’s a terrible thing but I had this woman parked outside our house.

“I would never say it to anyone else, but she drove me so crazy that I advised her to go to Weight Watchers, which was not a very nice thing to say.

“I’m not proud of it, but its weird how if you sort of feel like you’re being attacked you can become a real arsehole.”

I do agree with the whole being attacked and becoming a real arsehole thing though. If I was that lady, and Chris Martin was attacking me by telling me to go to Weight Watchers I would’ve become a real arsehole too, and punched him right in the face. I’d get him and his little Gwyneth too!

Chris Martin... so unbelievably mature! Can't you tell?

Paris Hilton is a fair-weather friend

Rumor has it Paris Hilton and Britney Spears are no longer friends. Apparently, Britney was nice about it, saying it wasn’t anything personal against Paris BUT Hilton has dubbed Spears “Animal” nonetheless.

Another friendship for Paris that has ended before it even began. I can’t help but wonder if Britney has given Paris a nickname of her own? Or maybe she just calls Paris what the rest of the world so affectionately refers to her as: “Slut”.

Paris Hilton: She's reading the art of war but she really practices the art of whore

Jessica Alba has no class

I don’t know what it is about this girl but I just can’t stand her! Maybe it’s the fact that guys are constantly drooling over her and girls say she seems so sweet and she’s so beautiful. Personally she reminds me of a chipmunk…

She also plays the same exact role in every movie she does (Idle Hands, Fantastic Four, Into The Blue etc.) The token “hot chick” (if you like that kind of thing) wearing tight and skimpy clothes. She never branches out to try any really serious or intelligent roles….

She is typecasted now because people somehow see this plain Jane stick girl as gorgeous… and that’s because the people that are holding movie auditions either have very bad taste or are very blind.

And she is apparently suing Playboy for putting her on the cover of their March issue because it will “give her a bad image”. And posing for other hoe magazines like Maxium, and FHM wearing barely anything, doesn’t give you a bad slutty image.

Wake up Jess. You are slutty. Or else you wouldn’t have won the “hottest girl” Playboy poll and you wouldn’t be posing for most of your photo shoots in bikinis. Man, being dumb must be a Jessica thing…

I was doing some research on the net, wondering what others thought about slutty Alba, and though many 14 year old boys thought she was hot many thought she was NOT. Here are some of my favorite Jessica comments.

So here is what the public had to say about this talentless hobag.

v She’s so freaking bland

v I’m a man saying I DON’T find Jessica Alba even remotely pretty and girls who don’t think she’s pretty aren’t JEALOUS of her!!!!! She makes me sick to my stomach because of her denial that she’s Latino… dying her hair, acting white. Give me a break!

v Alba couldn’t act her way out of a porn movie

v I find it rather interesting how Jessica Alba will do all these amoral things, and yet whenever she has some clothes on, she tries to dress like she is the “all American girl”, when quite clearly she is NOT.

v Jessica Alba you turned into a total SLUT! You’re a bad role model for teens!

v I fucking hate Jessica Alba. I think she’s so ugly and she's a ho. and she can not act. All she can do is shake her flat ass in front of a camera to get a job. She’s definitely a slut.

v Jessica Alba thinks she’s curvy but have you seen how skinny she is?

v I have heard lots of stories about how bitchy and stuck-up Jessica Alba is.

v -Me and a female friend met Jessica Alba while we were on Rodeo Drive and I have to admit, she is the biggest, rudest egocentric bitch in this world. My female friend told her that she thinks that (Jessica) is beautiful and Jessica was like "I know", then my female friend asked her which spa she goes, 'cause she wants to look gorgeous and have a nice tan like hers and Jessica answered back "You? ha! I don't think so"... Finally, we asked her to at least take a photo with us and she refused saying that she didn't have time for that.

v When head promoter Gordon Nicol asked if she would pose for a photo, Alba turned him down flat. When Nicol pointed out that celebs like Madonna, Hilary Duff and Selma Blair had all posed, Alba supposedly snapped, "I don't care!" and walked away. At that point, one of Alba's entourage told Nicol, "She's a bitch — sorry."

v Jessica Alba has told MTV that even dolphins want to have sex with her. She claims that when she was on location, filming the show Flipper, the dolphins became sexually aroused.

Jessica Alba wrinkley and scrawny. How sexy!

Karl Lagerfeld is a shallow douche bag!

Teen Vogue's December/January issue featured a story on skinny models that stated that some designers are not allowing anorexic looking models to walk the runway because it portrays a bad body image to girls.

Chanel designer Karl Lagerfeld commented on this by saying "The girls (models) are skinny. They have skinny bones. [Overweight women] need more treatment than skinny ones."

WHAT! So being overweight is a huge disgusting problem but looking like a stick (and like all you eat is lettuce and water) isn't an issue? That's beautiful right?

But chubby girls, they are gross and they have the problem? What the fuck?

Karl Lagerfeld so obviously the epitome of gorgeous! Ick!

"Everybody knows that the norm in fashion is thin. But excuse me, there are people born with the right genes for this profession."

More verbal gold from the shallow and stick-thin Gisele. God, how can anyone say SHE is curvy? Uck!

Hypocrite much? Yet another reason to HATE Jessica Alba!

Now read what she said again and then take a look below at the pictures I have found of the 'wholesome' Jessica.....

Now those pictures to me seem pretty revealing. Sure she may not be wearing a short skirt but she is in her underwear, topless, in bathing suits, and in NOTHING in sheets! Yeah posing naked is sluttier then wearing revealing clothes Jess. God, she must be slow. Can she even spell her own name?

Here let me help you Jessica.